HOWTO: Convert A Friend To Linux

Published on December 27, 2007 in Humor by Rami Taibah


Warning: You should proceed with caution using this Howto, if you do not know what you are doing you could damage your relationship with Friend 2.0 or totally break it. Also, using this Howto extensively with multiple Friend 2.0′s may damage Life 4.5, and end up as a sorrow lonely geek.

Prerequisites :

Before attempting to convert Friend to Linux, there are some major tweaks you need to do. If you already done these tweaks and living by them then good for you, if not then doing this is a MUST:

First of all you need to have a Friend first to convert before attempting to convert. And in order to have a Friend you need to have a Life right? Let me try to make it simpler for you my fellow geek: Now you have a package named whatever-3.42.tar.gz, what will you do? Untar it, then configure, make, make install right? But you will need a compiler first right? Now think of Life as your compiler, all of us have Life, but we need to recompile Life first using the -lessgeek and -moreoutgoing flags in order to create Life suitable for Friend. So in Life directory do the following:

sudo make install --lessgeek --moreoutgoing

This will take sometime, just like any compilation. What I am saying here isn’t STOP being a geek, you and I are proud of our geekdom. What I am saying is get out more, meet new people, reestablish old relationships. Be tactful with your Linux evangelism, don’t come off so hard! If you find uninterest from others don’t push it, there are other fish in the sea. You might want to run this command to help you get this done:

sudo umount /media/geek1

sudo mkdir /media/social

sudo mount /dev/social1 /media/social

After a while, and if you are doing things right, a couple versions of Friend will be installed and ready for conversion.

Luckily this step will not ruin or break Life, in fact it will probably advance it, and advance Linux popularity as well.

Before You Proceed:

All kidding aside, this is the most critical step, converting a friend and not doing it right could damage your relationship with your friend, and if not it WILL damage Linux’s image. It will come off as an unfriendly, complicated, and archaic OS. Letting this happen is a disservice to Linux and it’s community and will impede it’s acceptance among others. Word of mouth could make or break any product, ask me I am a marketeer.

I understand how new converts tend to be overzealous about Linux and want to convert everybody. But if you haven’t got all your major problems ironed out then how do you expect to iron out other people’s problems? So unless you got all your wireless, printing, multimedia, networking, display…etc figured out and have a fair understanding on how to get them working on your system. Please don’t try it out on other people’s systems.

Now this might sound a bit condescending, but let me set the record straight. I am no Linux whiz or genius, in fact I believe I know less than 10% of the amazing world of Linux, but I think I got the basics figured out.

Probing:

Most of us already have an abstract sense of how “tech savvy” people around us are. Some seem to be technically proficient while others drown in an inch of water. The latter should be immediately excluded from your “conversion sample”. Focus on those people that you feel have the interest and the expertise to wade into the waters of Linux. Set your eye on 3 or 4 of them and start preaching.

Preaching:

As I already said earlier, don’t come off so hard, be tactful. Don’t talk about Linux all day long, there are other cool stuff besides Linux you know. Whenever a technology subject comes up, talk about how Linux can make it better, not the other way around. Don’t get offended when someone berates Linux, just calmly argue with him and make your point clear, you don’t want to come off as bigoted fanatic do you?

Tools:

As Linux geeks, we know the true potential and power that Linux could offer. But let’s face it, lots of it is just way to geeky for regular folks. Your friend probably won’t be impressed if you talk about ssh and how “cool” it is. Nor will he care if you tell him that you can access the source code and manipulate it the way you deem fit. This stuff is just way to complicated for regular folks to get their heads around.

Instead talk about stuff they could relate to. Security, is a major concern for most people, and Linux has so much to offer in this department! Just telling them that there are no viruses, no worms, no trojans, and no spyware and that you don’t have all your valuable juice sucked up by Mcafee or Norton, will definitely raise a couple of eyebrows.

People are suckers for eyecandy, the guys at Redmond probably were banking solely on this when they came up with Vista, and they didn’t even do a good job at it. So have Compiz installed on your machine! I know that we geeks don’t really fall for such eyecandy, its just a resource hog, but keep it installed just don’t auto launch it. Whenever you wanna dazzle a potential convertee, fire it up. Whirl the cube, wobble, minimize, and shade the windows and they will be gagging for the Linux CD.

In short, keep it simple, don’t get too technical! Talk about GUI’s not CLI’s!

The Conversion:

Find out everything your friend needs in his/her machine. This will help you formulate a rough plan on what exactly to install. Be frank and honest, if your friend is a PC gamer, tell him that gaming is Linux’s Achilles heel. If you are aware of any other limitations that will reduce your friends productivity say it straight out. DON’T CONCEAL!!

If or when you get the nod, proceed to installing everything they might need or require in the future. Setup everything for them. I know you will probably do it from the command line, which will probably intimidate your friend, but politely explain to him that everything you are doing could be done from a GUI (Synaptic, Kuroo, Adept…etc) it’s just that you prefer doing it this way. Also, install wine and set it up, but don’t tell them about it just yet. Leave them explore open source programs before letting them into this little secret.

After Thoughts:

  • Do not leave them high and dry! They will probably call because something “isn’t working” and/or have other general questions. Arrange for a second meeting to solve them and answer all their enquiries.
  • Do not belittle any of their questions or actions. If they download an .EXE file and complain that it doesn’t work, just politely explain why it doesn’t work, and show them to the way to the package manager.
  • When you feel that they are comfortable with their new environment, encourage them to learn the command line, and try to simply explain how powerful it is.
  • Encourage them to Google!
  • Encourage them to tweak around, and explain to them that even if you break your system, you will be there to do it all over again.
  • Finally, FOLLOW UP! Take the initiative! Don’t wait for them to call you. You call them and ask if there are any problems they are facing or if they have any questions.


I tried to summarize my experience in conversion, while adding some tongue-in-cheek humor at the beginning. So far, in two year I have successfully converted 6 friends to Linux, and many more attempts that were less successful, but dabbled with Linux nonetheless. I hope you find this an interesting read, and if you have any suggestions or ideas that could be added to it please say so.

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About

Rami Taibah the founder of The Linuxologist and a self proclaimed geek and Linux aficionado. This fall, he will be pursuing an MIMS degree at UC Berkeley, California. You can follow him on Twitter @rtaibah.

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  • Dave W

    @SirYes: “Because we want to be freed, right?” Well, no. First and foremost, I want to do whatever it is I need to do on the computer. I don’t consider my computing a philosophical issue. It’s a means to an end, in the form of earning me money, and a diversion, in the form of goofing around. I know that makes me something of a odd duck by the common Linux ethos I hear expressed, but Linux is going to have to accept that 99% of the people do NOT see their computer as a philosophical statement*. I see most of the goals of the linux movement as generally positive, and involve myself with it for whatever reason, but when my needs and linux philosophy conflict, philosophy will /always/ lose for me. Every time. Always.

    @Hein Messeir, what “huge gap”? It’s rare a program I run on Linux that I can’t find ported to Windows. Open Office, or Star Office if you want to feed the Google monster, are freely available for Windows. So is AbiWord, The Gimp, Inkscape, Scribus, Blender, Wings3D… Plus free windows-only software, too, such as paint.Net. Since my job does NOT require perfect format compatibility for office documents, I’m free to use all these programs without paying a cent. I haven’t owned a “commercial” word processing application, spreadsheet, etc, in ages. And as opposed to Linux, when a free application is NOT good enough for my needs (Say, The Gimp), a commercial application is readily available to fill the need. No, telling a graphics designer to learn to code his own fixes to his graphics editor is not a valid answer, sorry, thanks for playing. Even if they knew how, which isn’t likely, I don’t know many clients of mine that would accept “Sorry, the free software I use to avoid paying money to a big corporation couldn’t do X, so I had to spend 2 weeks reprogramming it. You didn’t need this stuff on any particular deadline, right?” as a valid excuse.

    And yes. 3 software applications (It’s actually more) can be a “huge gap” if those programs are significant enough.

    Also, the whole piracy thing? Another person tried that tactic too. Red herring, seriously. And not even a particularly good one.

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  • http://redirect.alexa.com/redirect?brotee.blogspot.com BroTee

    Great post! Wonderful comments. I’ve learnt quite some useful things from here. Cheers.

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  • http://www.thebigfish.co.za Jansie Blom

    really funny!!!

  • http://goodbutbad.blogspot.com tyyoman1

    Fixing things in Linux can be a nightmare many times. And also there is a huge software gap. The software may be free but they are not productive. Here is an interesting article on this http://goodbutbad.blogspot.com/2008/03/can-we-live-with-linux.html

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    I am working exclusively on GNU/Linux for 3 years, now, and I do think that I am productive, and so is my software.

    That might be, because I study physics, and many other physic students also use GNU/Linux.

    I think the problem is rather: GNU/Linux does not yet offer the tools for everyone to be productive.

    First ask someone, if he/she thinks that you can work productively with GNU/Linux, then switch.

    Most people just want their browsers to work, their mailclients to check their mail and their music and videos to play.

    Fireforx does the browser part.
    Thunderbird/KMail/(insert Gnoem tool) does the mail part.

    Media:
    - Mailattachments can be opened by open office (works out of the box).
    - media files are opened by Kaffeine/Totem/Amarok (works out of the box)

    wmv files do create a few problems, but not many.

    One “problem” is with “cool new things” for windows. They often aren’t usable (that’s stuff like some flash games and similar small gadgets like a feng-shui program on cd or similar), but if they get really popular the chances are good that someone will write a free alternative.

    Same problem for games, but without the fix. There only wine can help.

  • Jay

    Now you see, if linux had something such as bootcamp (Though i dont really know what it is, but heard of it), im sure everything that runs on windows will run on linux, and linux will be more accepted.

  • http://www.ultumix.com Justin Breithaupt

    Well you guys make good points but however you have been deceived in your view of GNU/Linux software and what it can do.

    I designed Ultumix GNU/Linux 0.0.1.4 and it has all of the software anyone will ever need to do any productive project or home use or whatever. This software was not previously available or installed correctly.

    You can run any Windows program on Linux if you pay $60.00 for Cedega. Cedega is a program that will run any windows program and cross over Linux will also do the same. Wine is the free version of this and it comes in Ultumix but it only runs Windows 95, 98, 2000, NT, ME, Software and some XP software. The real question is do you need Microsoft software? NO! With Ultumix the software you get is enough to do anything you want.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    I don’t really think IO’ve been deceived.

    My Gentoo offers all I need.

    But it doesn’t offer all my wife needs (and at the same time far more than she’ll ever need – I just didn’t install all that).

    So sadly your post sounds more like weak advertising than like real information.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    Besides: GNU/Linux does have a “bootcamp”.

    It’s called multi-boot install and was avaible for quite a long time.

    It means, you simply install a windows alongside your linux, and when you really need a windows program, you just switch to windows.

    It also have something far better: Wine. Wine emulates the Windows API, so that Windows programs can directly run on GNU/Linux.

    That one is something I didn’t use yet, though. I don’t want unfree software on my computer, so why should I install windows programs?

  • Jay

    I mean so i can have a .exe on my linux desktop, run it or right click and run it as an emulation for windows, and it will do what ever the emulation software does then runs as if my linux was a windows machine, or as the program was deisnged for linux.

  • http://hehe2.net atropos

    @Arne: Yes it is just advertising, I really don’t know why I am tolerating it, maybe if he pushes is, I’ll have to take action…

  • http://www.ultumix.com Justin Breithaupt

    Whatever you guys think. All I’m saying is I made sure that I put all the video editors, audio editors, office, bla bla bla, that people would ever need into Ultumix. And the start menu has an all programs, accessories, layout. So really you can’t complain much. Yes it can run Windows programs. There is also a hack for it where you can install XP in Vmware and have all of your windows programs automatically start using the Windows shell instead. I’ve seen it but never done it because I already have all the free software I need.

    “When we have enough free software at our call.. Well kick out those dirty licenses ever more”

    That’s what I’ve done.

  • http://hehe2.net atropos

    Actually Justin, I think the more software you have the bad. You know security, performance…etc. More does not equal better.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    @Justin: Having all software won’t help (people can have that very easily).

    Sorting them in such a way, that people instantly know what to use when would be more useful.

    And the line is:
    “We’ll kick out those dirty licenses” with no condition anyhow. Regardless of how much software we have at our call, we’ll work on kicking out those licenses.

    And that’s because the philosophy behind that line is “proprietary software steals the freedom of people. Better not do anything than contribute to an unfree project.”

    Anything below that is a compromise (which I have to take from time to time, too, but which I try to avoid – for examply by throwing out the nonfree ati-drivers last week).

  • Jay

    “More does not equal better.”

    In open source it does. The more open source you have, the less security issues, performance issues and other bugs all round we have. You think linux would be at the state it is now if it wasnt open source? I doubt it would even have a proper GUI if you had to pay for it.

  • http://hehe2.net atropos

    @Jay: Where did I say “More open source code does not equal better”??

    All I said more applications you have bundled in your distro doesn’t mean better. In fact the more applications you have the more often you will need to update, debugging …etc. Generally it’s best practice to install what you need. Why don’t you just go to Synaptic and click on every piece of software there and install it?

  • Jay

    I dont think he means bundled with distro, i dont even think he said that.

  • http://hehe2.net atropos

    “All I’m saying is I made sure that I put all the video editors, audio editors, office, bla bla bla, that people would ever need into Ultumix. And the start menu has an all programs, accessories,”

    He has a distro called Ultimix, and he put everything into it. Or at least thats what I understand.

  • http://www.ultumix.com Justin Breithaupt

    Your correct. I did put a bunch of software in Ultumix but I have diffrent editions. Ultumix Standard Edition, Gamer Edition, and Ultimate Edition. Each have more software than the last. Basically I got sick and tired of installing all those packages on a customer’s computer instead of just having them there and working. Yes friends working. I worked very hard to make sure that the software all works so that you don’t have to worry about a particular system rejecting it unless your system does not have enough RAM HD space or is not Direct X 9 complaint.

    Here you want to see what I’m talking about? Here is a brief demo of the Gamer edition. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUMZdGwnC3I

    It just makes it easier for Windows users to convert. They don’t have to install anything and it all works. Thats what is important.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    I like the idea of having different editions of the Distro for different kinds of users, but maybe you should somewhat change your advertising style…

  • Jay

    Justin, with all due respect, piss off. Noone wants your crappy OS. Stop advertising.

  • http://www.ultumix.com Justin Breithaupt

    Jay I guess someone should tell my over 40,000 users that they don’t want my crapy OS. :) I’ll stop talking about it here I just thought it was a good way to convert people. Thats why I made it.

  • Jay

    40k hey? How many does Ubuntu have again? Oh thats right.

  • http://www.ultumix.com Justin Breithaupt

    Hey Jay I am going to state some FACTS here so don’t be offended. They are not directed at you. Back when I wanted to join Ubuntu LoCos and help promote GNU/Linux by starting a LoCo here they got really angry at me for supporting multiple Distros. They said that we all must support Ubuntu or else. I asked why. The answer I got shocked me to no end and I got it from several people. They told me that the reason we should only promote Ubuntu is because the choice of distros confuses people and that it all needs standardized into Ubuntu. I’m sorry but my customers don’t like Gnome. Neither do I. Further more I don’t want to be part of a one world order. Oh wait that’s Microsoft. Just Kidding. So I set out to make a Distribution by Previous Windows users for Windows Users. If you don’t like it don’t install it.

    As for Ubuntu I think they need to get a handle on the animal that is LoCo before it gets out of control and undermines them.

    I switched to PCLinuxOS. PCLinuxOS got mad at me understandably because I made a mistake and accidentally put win32 codecs in my distro. They also got mad at me for using libdvd. I’m not sure why. So I cut that out and still they were mad.

    Here is a present day Fact as of today. PCLinuxOS 2008 HE…
    Includes: Wine, w32codecs, dvd playback, ntfs,…

    Wait a second! Something does not add up. Fuzzy math.

    Before I left PCLinuxOS completely and gave up on their community they told me they had come up with rules on how someone could make an OS without going threw what I went threw. Part of those rules was not using Illegal codecs. They are announcing that they are using them!

    Now one more really good point to make after stating all of this is that Your going to hurt a lot of new Linux converts by getting them mixed up in all of this. They enter forums and IRCs and get caught in the cross fire of this. Not to mention how bad it makes the GNU/Linux community look as a hole. Richard Stallman does not like this. I have e-mailed him personally and we talk back and forth. He does not like any of this.

    So do try to knock it off. It does not matter who is right or wrong here.

    You used childish foul language such as crapy in your post. I’m sorry but that does not help anything. I don’t need to explain myself. My goal is to help people and yes I want to make people happy and not step on toes but when I’m not doing anything wrong I stop caring if it means I have to sacrifice a good product. Richard Stallman and me don’t agree on the use of Adobe flash player and other things but thats ok. We still get along. Linus does not agree with him either but they get along.

    GROW UP for the sake of the new Linux converts.

  • Jay

    Now you know im not gona read all that. And your OS is besides the point. What we’re all telling you to do is, fuck off. Advertise elsewhere.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    @Justin: Please keep your own language in check, and don’t pull Stallman in here, when he isn’t needed. He’s got more important things to do than helping your argumentation.

    If you look at what *I* wrote, you’ll see I did never say “Your distro is bad” or anything similar.

    I just said: “Your advertising is a good deal too blunt.”

    Why do you jump at people who say things intended to offend you?

    Or to put it differently: Why didn’t you react to my post with backup information, why Ultumix is good and where it helps to convert people, cutting out the advertising language so it can be read as information?

    I see that you’re pissed off by Ubuntu (I don’t like the “one distro to find them, one distro to …” mindset (you told about) either, but I doubt that all Ubuntu people have it. I’m not active in Ubuntu, so I don’t know much about the internals (I don’t even know what LoCo means – I assume Local Coordinators or so), I just installed it for my wife, because my Gentoo might be a bit too much for her).

    You’re pissed, and that’s OK. I think if I had walked your way, I might be pissed, too. But it doesn’t help you spread your Distro to other people.

    Get a grip on your emotions – get a sandbag and hit it when you’re just a bit too pissed (I do that from time to time, and unless you tested it yourself, it might be hard for you to see how very good it feels to just let out the anger at that 15kg sandbag). But stop, before your knuckles bleed :)

    And I know I sound like a pseudo-wise great grandfather now. That isn’t intentional. I’m learnign my way in life myself, and I might just be wrong about it (and also about anything else I think I know), but I write it anyway, because I made some errors myself, and I want to help others not to walk into the same trap. And if what I see right now is only a necessary transition to even better ways to live, then I can at least help others reach that transition with less harship than I had.

  • http://www.ultumix.com Justin Breithaupt

    Well I do have to say Jay’s latest post does not impress me but I do see where your coming from. Your right about my video being blunt about the OS and my post but thats mainly because I’ve been criticized in the past for having lengthy videos and articles. I’ve faced a lot of Internet Trolls and button pushers. I just figured that stating what I did about my previous experiences in negative communities would help prevent further outbreaks. The thing is if you get involved enough you will see a distro war going on that is just stupid. It will make you say I thought we were all working towards the same goal?

    That was the point I was trying to make. I’m not pissed off really but I’m just trying to get threw. Now that I know I can’t get threw to Jay I won’t try because it will just make things worse. It’s just too bad innocent people get caught in the cross fire.

    In our small developing community we basically have next to no rules that would exclude anyone. People that have been kicked out of different communities like the PCLinuxOS forums have came to our quiet little corner of the internet for support. Some claim they have been rejected because they can’t spell very good. Others just say there is no method or madness to it. I don’t care because everyone is forgiven when they enter my forum unless they try to make people mad.

    One of the greatest obsticals I face is being a Christian. A lot of trollers discriminate against me and attack me for my faith. You might ask why I don’t just take it off my site? Simple. Freedom of expression and because it’s part of my religion and morals to spread the word of Jesus Christ. Richard Stallman was kind enough to help me with that too. He is very wise. He told me to set up an FAQ that answered people’s questions and it would stop and so it did.

    I’m taking a great risk by stepping out again and trying to educate people about the exclusion and devision in the GNU/Linux community that we want to ignore.

    Ubuntu LoCo is a federation if you will that wants a (Ubuntu LUG) Ubuntu LoCo in every state and then wants sub locos under that state loco. I was very interested in this idea but when exclusion was part of it I was not. In the public forums they deny this but in their mailing list anything goes. I don’t know if they have changed and I don’t care if they have. Basically I’m paying attention to what communities reject innocent people and I’m boycotting their distros. Why do you think I only work with Linux Mint? There the only ones that have embraced me and my friends without shunning us.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    You sprading the word of christ will sadly keep me from ever trying your Ultumix. But heck, you’re free to do whatever you feel best with your distro.

    I won’t take part in anything which openly spreads christian faith (which for me is mainly characterized by oppression) into our community, as long as there aren’t really pressing reasons for doing so. Christian faith is discrimination and exclusion to me.

    I don’t have a problem with some members of a community trying to spread their faith, but as soon as the whole community dedicates itself to only one faith, I’m out.

  • Jay

    LOL! Religion. Don’t even get me started on that fairy tale.

  • http://10kluke.info/ Luke

    I should try Gimpshop. The Gimp definitely seems less intuitive to me than Photoshop did. It would certainly be nice if wine ran everything.

  • http://draketo.de Arne Babenhauserheide

    Most programs run by wine aren’t free, so that’s no solution for me.

    It also isn’t part of the problem, because it allows people to use unfree software in a free environment, but it also isn’t a solution.

    Having a free replacement for any unfree software is mor of a solution to me.

  • Andreas

    Hey, come on. Compiz might be a resource hog, but installing it with an old rv250-based ATI graphics card IS a geek job.

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  • http://actually.ibuildsystems.com sims

    Don’t preach GUIs. Don’t preach. *Use* the CLI. Show others how to use it. It’s cool. It’s smart. It’s simple. I think that it is better for humans to become more intelligent that for software to develop to a state where we are not required to think.

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